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Scientific argument
Consent: an enthusiastic and constant yes
Consent is the foundation of any healthy, respectful relationship. But how do you know if someone truly consents? Even the smallest gesture is fraught with ambiguity. A sigh can mean desire, boredom, or embarrassment. How can you know without checking?
Only clear and enthusiastic “yeses” count. In eight points:
- Des doutes ? Il vaut mieux s'abstenir.
- L'absence de "non" ne signifie pas "oui".
- Le consentement peut être retiré à tout moment.
- Vérifiez le consentement à chaque étape.
- Posez des questions claires et directes.
- Respectez les limites de l'autre.
- Ne soyez pas insistant, c'est déjà de l’agressivité.
- Ne forcez jamais quelqu'un à faire quelque chose qu'il ne veut pas faire.Consent is an ongoing process.
What happened yesterday does not guarantee consent today.
Consider the context.
Alcohol, drugs and fatigue can impair consent.
Be aware of social and cultural pressures.
Some people may feel pressured to say “yes” even if they don’t want to.
If you have any doubts, it is always best to ask.
Consent is essential for a healthy and positive sex life.
By taking the time to check consent, we can create more respectful and fulfilling relationships.
Consent: a labyrinth of ambiguities
The slightest gesture, a sigh, a look... how can we decipher the signs of consent? Ensuring that the other person is truly consenting, in the present moment and over time, is a complex challenge, fraught with pitfalls and ambiguities.
The ambiguity of body language
A sigh can mean desire, boredom, embarrassment… A silence can be acquiescence or hesitation. How do you know without checking? Verbal communication is essential. Asking for consent clearly and directly is the only way to dispel doubt.
The weight of fantasies and roles
Does the other person see you as yourself, or as the object of their fantasy, a fantasized character? Then the question arises of the place we occupy in the act. Are we a desired partner or a projection that will never fulfill their desires?
The importance of context
A “yes” given under the influence of alcohol, drugs, or a manipulative person is not true consent. It is crucial to consider the context and circumstances to ensure that consent is free and informed.
Check, again and again
Consent is not a definitive achievement. It is essential to check it at every stage, at every move, until the very end. But vigilance does not stop there. The next day, 6 months or 6 years later, it is important to question yourself. Was this “yes” sincere? Was it not influenced by external factors? Silence is not consent The absence of a “no” does not necessarily mean a “yes”. Silence can be a manifestation of fear, shame, or an inability to express one’s refusal. It is crucial to respect silence and not to misinterpret it as consent.
Responsibility and respect
Obtaining consent is a responsibility that falls to each individual. It is an act of respect for others and for oneself. By taking the time to communicate clearly and ensure consent, we build healthy and trusting relationships.
Communicate openly
The best way to ensure consent is to communicate openly and clearly. Ask your partner what they want, what they don't want, and what they like.
And after the act?
Consent doesn't end after sex. It's important to ask yourself if the "yes" was really a "yes."
Was it an enthusiastic yes or a hesitant yes?
Did the person seem comfortable and confident?
Was there a feeling of pressure or manipulation?
Even if you have no doubts, it is important to talk to the other person about it, to go back over it, to check and check again.
Consent is an important topic that should not be taken lightly.
By taking the time to understand and respect consent, we can create healthier, more fulfilling relationships.
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